Husband And Wife Jokes

How can you spoil your wife’s birthday if you don’t even remember when it is?

How to explain to his wife that, even though his son is only three months old, and he wants to play LEGO now?

If the wife complains that you are never going anywhere, invite her to go out for a beer together.

Husband to his wife:

-Did you see a toothpick?
Wife, contemptuously:

-In your pants.

Mom teaches her daughter:

-If you want a good husband, then marry a good boy.
At this time, dad teaches his son:

-If you want a good wife, then marry a bad girl

“And my wife is very kind,” say those who did not get a beautiful one.

-Why did you give your wife such an expensive gift?

-So now she will not let me wash the dishes!

When the guests stay too long, my husband asks me to sing.

I’m tired of this love triangle – work, lover, wife. Therefore, I no longer work.

Wife to her husband:

-What are you afraid of him, are you a man or a mouse?

-Oh, I wanted something cheese

My wife and I have been living for 15 years, and she tried to kiss me yesterday. Maybe she likes me?

I once dreamed that my wife was snoring loudly. I wake up: nothing like that – I’m not married!

“Doctor, my wife says it’s good to eat raw food.”
“Mine doesn’t like to cook either.”

Your girlfriend should be liked only by you, and not by your parents, friends, and especially your wife.

My wife said that I spend a little time with the child, and then she pointed to some small boy in our house.

Marriage is when a woman’s husband protects everyone from her.

Family Chronicles. My wife went on a diet and began to give her dinner to me, so we became enemies.

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