Funny Jokes

Top 50 Birthday Jokes For Kids & Adults (2020)

Do you ever think that your Birthday can be a joke? Just Kidding, Guys. But make your special day unforgettable one for others. So use our top 50 Birthday Jokes For Kids. They are so funny that you surely pick more from those. Please do not forget to go through our whole article.

  1. The brain is a unique organ. It works 365 days a year, 24 hours a day. It works from the moment you are born until the moment you enter the examination hall. 
  2. A man comes to a friend’s Birthday: Where is my gift? He says: I will give the best gift that is made by yourself! Therefore, I give it to you. The birthday boy replies: Nevermind! 
  3. Mom, I want a dog for my Birthday. She replies: Good, boy, I’ll cook it according to your favorite recipe. 
  4. Wife says: Let’s spend the best years of your life on me. But it will be like my Birthday. Dear, do you remember that my mom has a birthday tomorrow? Husband replies: Damn, well, every year, the same thing.
  5. How could I ruin my wife’s Birthday if I don’t even remember when it was?
  6. Today Dad gave money to us for his birthday, and tomorrow we’ll go to mom to buy shoes. 
  7. Two friends are talking: Why were you yelling all night yesterday on the phone? One replies: Yes, I congratulated my best friend on his Birthday. 
  8. Birthdays are good for your health. British scientists have shown that those who had more birthdays lived longer.
  9. The medicines have risen in price so much that soon we will give each other their birthdays to live to the next year. 
  10. A friend said I ruined her Birthday. But how could I, if I don’t even remember who she is? 
  11. A woman’s Birthday is better to remember; her year of birth is better to forget. 
  12. I saw that a man gave a homeless guy 10 dollars. I heard more wishes than on my Birthday. 
  13. Celebrating birthdays is very strange: you get gifts for slowly approaching death. 
  14. Never wish people on their Birthday to “remain as they are.” Many take it seriously and for forever.
  15. Happy Birthday! I wish you happiness, love, health, beauty, more money, an apartment, exciting work, loyal friends, intelligence, and everything else.
  16. How to understand that you are not valuable to your parents? On your Birthday, they present you with a motorcycle.
  17. I was especially born in the summer so that on my Birthday there is always a barbecue instead of a cake.
  18. In old age, Birthday is a funeral celebration of years of incompetent life.
  19. Today I did not sleep until five in the morning, waiting for my cat to fall asleep. The thing is, it’s his birthday today. And I wanted to wait until he fell asleep, to put a gift to him quietly. He will wake up and be glad.
  20. My friend has a birthday today. He does not drink, smoke, or cheat on his girlfriend. Don’t know how to celebrate.
  21. If you count the age in weeks, you can celebrate a birthday every Friday.
  22. I’m still at that age when a Birthday can be considered a holiday.
  23. I bought my wife a box of powder for her Birthday. From time to time, I add flour to it so that it lasts for a long time.
  24. Mother strictly asks Little Johnny! Why weren’t you at school yesterday? The boy replies: I made a gift to the teacher. Mom asks: Which present? Then the boy replies: She had a birthday yesterday. So I decided to let her rest without me.
  25.  Dear, what would you like to receive on your Birthday? We need a new iron. 
  26. A friend wishes the blonde girl a happy birthday: I want you to have obedient children, a loving husband, healthy parents. She replies: Thank you! And where to put those? 
  27. SMS exchange – Girl, asks: Honey, what will you give for my Birthday? He replies: Oh, I don’t care! I sent a joke from my old iPhone, which all my friends are laughing at!
  28. A Little boy always brought two bags of candy to his school for his Birthday, while the rest of the guys usually brought one each. The fact is that he is the son of a dentist.
  29. A woman on her Birthday does not become a year older, but a year more dangerous. 
  30. Dear, I bought five pairs of nylon stockings for your Birthday. The birthday girl tells My pantyhose! The friend replies: Well if you don’t wear it, I will. 
  31. The girls are so funny. They hate when you ask them about their age, but they’re ready to kill if you forgot about their Birthday
  32. The habit of forgetting someone else’s birthdays allows you to save a significant amount of money.
  33. Today is my Birthday. The difference of this day from all the other days is that usually, the wife says to me on different days: “Wash the dishes,” and on my Birthday: Wash the dishes, please.
  34. There are two seven-story buildings opposite each other. One neighbor yells to another: Hey! When is your Birthday? Second one: In January. What for? The first one replies: I’ll give you the curtains. And then the whole house sees how your wife does that job. The second one asks: And when is yours? Again the first one asks: In April. Why do you need it? He replies: I’ll give you binoculars so you can see whose wife she is.
  35. A three-year-old kid receives a birthday present from his grandmother. Turning it around, he sees that it is a water gun and, screaming with delight, runs to fill it quickly. Mom is not happy and dials her mother’s number: Mom, do you remember how we made you crazy with our water guns?
  36. In addition to good health, others wished me longevity on my Birthday. I’m already at that age. I only get longevity.
  37. Doctor to nurse: Sister, what is it? Do we have a patient with a burning candle in his ass? The nurse answered: today is his birthday!
  38. A highly respected customer enters the bakery: Good afternoon, I need a birthday cake for my wife. The baker asks: How many candles? He replies, laughing: 30, as always.
  39. A wife bought her husband a tie for his birthday: Well, dear, did you like it? What do you think? Is it best for you? The husband looked at the monstrous colors of his tie and answered: A long beard!
  40. The guy calls the girl: Hello! What flowers do you like? – Roses. Again he asks: Red or white? – Reds. Again he asks: I see, how do you feel about champagne with candles? Then the girl asks: Yeah, Are you preparing something for my birthday? Finally, he answers: Yeah, I’m getting ready. Now I’m sitting, choosing a postcard for you.
  41. The wife addresses her husband: My birthday is tomorrow !!! Do you remember my favorite? Then the husband answers: Of course!!! I cannot forget this date. My car insurance ends tomorrow.
  42. You will never write “Happy Birthday” on the street because I was born in the winter. Friends replies laughing: You are mistaken. We will write, only the letters will be yellow.  
  43. It isn’t good when others give you a doll for your Birthday. It’s especially bad if you are a man, you are over thirty, and it’s an inflatable doll. 
  44. Girls, remember that on March 8 and your Birthday, there are no ex-boys. 
  45. If i judge by the SMS that I received on my birthday, my best friends should be a bank or a cellular company. 
  46. A boy asks Mom, why are there two drunken grandfathers sleeping in my bedroom? Then Mom replies: Yesterday was your grandmother’s Birthday.
  47. In my opinion, giving girls a soft birthday toy is the wrong manner! For her Birthday, girls need to provide a solid toy!
  48. I like your picture, but it’s like a birthday. 
  49. There was a girl who never knew how to surprise. So her grandmother’s Birthday, she presented a sample application for a gift. 
  50. I gave my wife a scale, and she gave me a ruler for my Birthday this year. I did not understand anything.

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